Constantly raining...

Constantly raining... http://purplishrain.multiply.com/ My sins: Lindt Dark Choc. Jap Green Tea Ice Cream. Pokka Green Tea. Ketcap Manis Chicken Wings. Doritos. Turkish Bread with Avocardo Sour Cream Dip. Chicken Avocardo Pasta. Crown Mango Cake. Ice Chocolate.Affair With My Blanket (Snoozing). Grey's Anatomy. Complaining. Short-tempered. Impatience.Pessimism. Self-doubt. Imaginative Imagination. Anti-Med. Caffine. Little Sleep. Fri, 20 Jun 2008 17:57:26 -0000 Fri, 20 Jun 2008 15:22:27 -0000 Constantly raining... http://images.purplishrain.multiply.com/logo http://purplishrain.multiply.com 100 100 Pulled the Plug Finally. Not sure if its the exam "stress" or just the chronicity or the recent spade of events. I finally did it. Pulled the plug. Not just once but twice. It came out messily, it came out in the blurb, but I did it. Not once, but twice. An addiction I have learnt as a very painful lession. An addiction not in the DSM-IV An addiction that I will go cold turkey probably for a while. For all of us, perhaps it will hurt But at least for a while, better than what it has been for a long long time. Too long. Too much. Too overwhelming. Too i don't know... tiring For now, let me walk down my imaginary aile with DSM-IV And just let me be free. Free from your scruity, your judgement and your thoughts. Perhaps regret will come my way when that DSM-IV finally bores me And I'll be an old woman living in shoe with her cats But who knows, I might not live till tommorrow So just let me free today. http://purplishrain.multiply.com/journal/item/56/Pulled_the_Plug_ Fri, 20 Jun 2008 15:22:27 -0000 Decisions Decisions decisions The decision of 2008 After being an escapee of the harsh realities of the wipe out of XX collegeS type pple into XX's land's Medical School, its time to decide to join them or not. Scarred since high school, the constant degredation, the constant academic comparison, the constant "basically, hmm u dont have the grades so buzz off, you don't have any chance" attitude. I am an escappee of the Singapore system for 7 years and running now. I feel small compared to these people, I feel inadequate, I feel I'm not good enough. Imagine working with people that I've once been judged as inadequate when compared to them Imagine being judged against these people who's been deemed superior S-C-A-R-Y I feel small and intimidated I feel like pee-ing like a little girl into my pants Dont get me wrong, I love home I want to go home I really do. Home is an eventual thing. When. Is the question. To prolong my escapee-ism to 8 years or leave it at 7. I want to go home To prove my previous @$@#$... http://purplishrain.multiply.com/journal/item/55/Decisions_ Mon, 7 Apr 2008 11:35:39 -0000 FEEL DAAM DUMB Yesterday, under the instigation of me and my fanitic interest in psychtiatry my group went on an excursion next door to the SERCURE psychiatry ward. Its SERCURE-ly man-ned. with double or triple locked pathways (ie 3 doors to get thru to get out). Its Different from the Acute Psychiatric Ward that we've been hanging out in. Students are not allowed in the SERCURE psychiatric ward cos the patients are too mentally disturbed, patients have a history of aggression, patients are too unwell to be looked after in the community, or have been thru the forensic system before (i.e jail). Basically one step up from SERCURE psychiatric ward is the forensic system (i.e. jail house for psychiatric patients). And there's an average of 5 discharges a year in that ward with 20 off people.  I.e. patients have to quiet unwell cos they dont get well enough to be managed for elsewhere. Today, as i exited the lift in the main hosp area about 400metres away fr... http://purplishrain.multiply.com/journal/item/54/FEEL_DAAM_DUMB Wed, 12 Mar 2008 02:43:27 -0000 Shrink me baby one more time! I think Britney Spears has bipolar I disorder. Hence the title. Bookmark Feb 08. Totally Shrinked in the 4 weeks plus 1 day of Feb 08. Shrinked into wanting to be a shrink and conduct shrinking business for the rest of my life. I've fallen Fallen in Love Tragically, not with a male/female. But anyway, still in Love. In love with<s> Shrinky business</s>  Psychiatry.  Its really scary, akin to falling in love. It happens suddenly, most unexpectedly. It creeps up under your skin before you realize you’re addicted. Addicted into seeing its patients. Addicted into going to school. Addicted into listening at ward rounds and case presentations. Psychiatry, one of the under-rated specalities in Medicine. But why shinky business, Miss Kee? “There’s no cure, no hope for any of these patients. Aren’t you scared of <s>mad</s> mentally unwell people? You mean you went to MEDICAL school to be a Shrink!!?!?!”  False.False.False. Do we cure Heart fai... http://purplishrain.multiply.com/journal/item/53/Shrink_me_baby_one_more_time_ Wed, 5 Mar 2008 06:11:24 -0000 O-eight, O-eight How did your 0-eight start? Mine was heart breaking, mind wobbling, stomach-churning. Its like hmm... taking a rollar coaster up and down, down and up. repeatedly. Somewhat being forced on, maybe. Or hmm more like finding yourself on a faulty rollar-coaster that won't stop. And you're on a ride that seems like eternity... Its terrrible now, but when u eventually do get down, its a lot worst. Cos that's when gravity hits you and everything in that suffering tummy of yours begin to disobey Newton's Law. Projectile vomitus here it comes. *pukkkeeeeeee* ... it had better not be gren. http://purplishrain.multiply.com/journal/item/52/O-eight_O-eight Fri, 18 Jan 2008 07:34:04 -0000 MUMBAI Mumbai photos first. Holiday parts of India - akan datang cos too many photos to choose from!!! Keep checking, will up load as they are taken!! http://purplishrain.multiply.com/photos/album/21/MUMBAI_ Mon, 14 Jan 2008 10:54:21 -0000 Dee good and dee bad Quickie lil' postie. Just wanted to share. 2 things. Some peadiatrician at world renown Kiddy Hosp "Peadiatrics is like being a Vet, the kid is like an animal; that can't speak." Awfully well said. Another thing, a wonderful verse written by Emily Perl Kingsley in 1987. Read it, enjoy it... <h2 align="center">WELCOME TO HOLLAND</h2> by Emily Perl Kingsley. I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this...... When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting. After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says... http://purplishrain.multiply.com/journal/item/51/Dee_good_and_dee_bad_ Thu, 15 Nov 2007 12:04:35 -0000 Semester 11 Yes Psychiatry, RAP (rehabilitation, Aged care, palliation medicine - not a very politically correct name), RURAL (URGH!!!) i.e a sem of sedation, can feel my brain matter regressing already :) http://purplishrain.multiply.com/calendar/item/10010/Semester_11_ Mon, 5 Nov 2007 13:36:57 -0000 HOME home for 5-6 days (depending if i manage to get out of CNY celebrations) yes, home if i survived india :) http://purplishrain.multiply.com/calendar/item/10009/HOME_ Mon, 5 Nov 2007 13:27:21 -0000 MUMBAI Land of bollywood (that costs 140 USD to enter. maddness im boycotting it) for elective haha. In a hospital which patients dont speak my language and supposedly lots of Tuberculosis.... :S Everyone pray for http://purplishrain.multiply.com/calendar/item/10008/MUMBAI Mon, 5 Nov 2007 13:26:32 -0000 India!!!! leaving for India on a mini-vacation. Going Dehli, Varasani (where ghats are... haha basically burnt bodies all over this river muhahhaa), Agra (where the Taj is), Jaipur (some pink city) and Udaipur (this romantic floating palace!!) in 9 days! Lots of butter chicken, nan bread, curry, street food and saris! :) http://purplishrain.multiply.com/calendar/item/10007/India_ Mon, 5 Nov 2007 13:24:47 -0000 Going back home!!! :) Hopefully to my new house, with my OWN room and OWN balcony! And a pool and i gigantic TV (that is so huge your optometrist will have every reason to grin). Yes, entry fee will be charged to my dad's new country club. Come visit! :) http://purplishrain.multiply.com/calendar/item/10006/Going_back_home_ Mon, 5 Nov 2007 13:22:13 -0000 BBBoooo... Yup, I'm still alive (Tragically) These past few months.. have been painful and slow. Still immensed in a confusional state about the professional side of my life, the emotional side of my life, the life part of my life. Basically, not quite good. And yes, I have not been blogging. Still getting pass post Semester 9 mental trauma from major exams and re-evaluating if i'm fitted for medicine. :( ... okay shall not get there, as bad school mad school still gotta go med school. Winter break was one of the sweetest nicest holidays in a long time. Not a care in the world, nothing to do with med holiday breaks. I had lots of fun... most of it, minus the fact i wanted to kick some one (no 2ones) in the balls. I went night blading, ate like a glutton, finally clubbed at St James 1.5 times (the other 0.5 i came out not knowing where i was or if heaven was earth and earth was heaven..) met up with lots of people one of whom i do hold truely close to my heart, and spent a few weeks at a place th... http://purplishrain.multiply.com/journal/item/50/BBBoooo... Mon, 5 Nov 2007 13:15:19 -0000 Goodbye... Results are out. There goes my dream job, my life insurance... My just in case JB attacks Spore plan, Spore sinks plan.. and just in case i get divorced plan. Okay. New goal: 80K / mth man, then no need to work anymore. This kinda results, who wanna employ me? :( http://purplishrain.multiply.com/journal/item/49/Goodbye..._ Tue, 10 Jul 2007 16:15:48 -0000 It's over.... It's over. It's over... It's really over... Yes, exams are over. Excited. Not the least bit. Scared. Very. After 5 months of an average of 5.5 hrs per night, currently more than 20 (yes i finally had time to count them) pimples across my 5cm by 2cm forehead, peeing and thinking about IHD (ischaemic heart disease i.e.heart attack), sh*tting and thinking about CVA (cerebrovascular disease i.e. stroke), eating fries and thinking about Diabetes, watching pple smoke while waiting for the tram and thinking about COPD (chronic obstructive pulmonary disease i.e. smoker's lung), lying in bed and thinking about Hypertension i.e. high blood pressure, drinking coffee and thinking about hypercholestrolemia (high cholestrol)..... and of course, other time sitting down in the library and studying the rest of the more important stufff.... The exams ended. And with a BANG. I seriously think I need to buy lottery. I HAVE NEVER been so lucky in my life (not that i was ever lucky to start with). My long c... http://purplishrain.multiply.com/journal/item/48/Its_over...._ Thu, 28 Jun 2007 09:00:20 -0000 Change <a href="/photos/hi-res/upload/RkRyPgoKCqQAAEgG0FE1"></a><a href="/photos/hi-res/upload/RkR0VAoKCqQAAGLnX3M1"><img class="alignmiddle" src="http://images.purplishrain.multiply.com/image/1/photos/upload/300x300/RkR0VAoKCqQAAGLnX3M1/Picture%20008.jpg?et=Dm7tENSRHm8%2CRtsB3csF2Q" border="0"></a>Jaci's 20th Birthday... 2004 May <a href="/photos/hi-res/upload/RkRyPgoKCqQAAEgG0FE1"><img class="alignmiddle" src="http://images.purplishrain.multiply.com/image/1/photos/upload/300x300/RkRyPgoKCqQAAEgG0FE1/IMG_0142.JPG?et=86iqxtDPHmVy%2B9omyNv30A" border="0"></a>                                             Jaci's 2Xth Birthday 2007 Change, Its an amazing thing huh? :) One of the first very first 2 people I met when i first came to melby. Honestly, the best thing here, yes ranked one after Medicine. And I know Im growing ollllddddd soon, 2Xth birthday (by the order of the great Ms Kee, birthdays from now will be 2Xth and ONLY one candle only) coming up. To those reading this, tho I may visit the snuggles at the hospital gift shop daily and perhaps spend more time there than on the wards, NO stuffed animals pleassseee. I've already upgraded to a 40L backpack for traveling, just to accommodate all the current snuggies :( Anyway, some updates: 5 weeks to ABSOLUTE finals :( 20th June : Wri... http://purplishrain.multiply.com/journal/item/47/Change_ Fri, 11 May 2007 13:59:52 -0000 Triviaaaaaaa GENERALdate5 days post appendicitis - borednameJaninebirthday0606height1.65 and growing... yeaheye colourblackhair colourblaccckkkk shoe size8clothing size8-10? 9 la :) right or left handedRweaknessesgan jioooonnnggfearserm saying bye bye and for now failing sem 9dislikesliars, irritants, parasites TODAYfirst person in minderm erm someone from lala land thoughts first waking upTMR is monday! ARE YOU...shyyesa bitchmaybetalkativesometimesforgivinghoping to behappyNO in loveyeah, with my beda health freakalmostTHIS OR THATroxy/fubu? ah... im 20-something already leh neitherchocolate/vanillaCHOCOLATEcappaccino/lattecappaccinoooooooskating/motocrossskating! lipstick/lipglosslipglosscoke/pepsineithermaccas/burger kingmaccccaassssssMYER/david jones??skunkwear/waves??curly hair/straightstraight! deoderant/perfumedeoderantwinter/summersummerblonde/brunettebrunette anytime :)personality/lookserm personality?rich/famousneither books/magazinesmags!roses/frangipanniesrosesbarbie/disney princesse... http://purplishrain.multiply.com/journal/item/45/Triviaaaaaaa Sun, 1 Apr 2007 07:01:39 -0000 Finally being on the other side - I am the patient with appendicitis Trouble started on 27th March 0130 hrs 7 Characterisitcs of my pain: Site: Epigastric (Above umbilicus) Severity: 9/10 Setting: Sudden, while mugging daam boring peripheral vascular disease Quality: Sharp Time: 2 minutes, awoken from sleep with pain. Aggrevating factors: none identified Relieving factors: none identified Assocaited symptoms: nausea, vomiting X 1, no change in bowel movements. My differentials then: 1. Gastritis: But should be burning pain and not sharp pain. And i tried some antacids (mylanta) and it didn't go away... 2. Appendicitis: But pain should central then classically moves to the Right iliac fossa (erm right lower quadrant) 3.Perforated Gastric Ulcer: I'll be pale, sweating and maybe dead. So quite unlikely. Then... i proded around my tummy. Palpate (press press abit) left, palpate right... Holy shit! Right Lower Quadrant pain! And then all I could remember was my surgical textbook saying: 50% of appendicits will have one episode of vomiting or diarrhoea before ... http://purplishrain.multiply.com/journal/item/42/Finally_being_on_the_other_side_-_I_am_the_patient_with_appendicitis Wed, 28 Mar 2007 08:04:48 -0000 150207 Feeling a little restless tonight, and giving school a miss tmr. I think I really need a break, been quite worn lately, with a relapse of insomnia :( I thought I've recovered, but perhaps with was nothing but a remission... "Forgive, sounds good Forget, I'm not sure I could They say time heals everything But I'm still waiting I'm through with doubt There's nothing left for me to figure out I've paid a price And I'll keep paying" - Dixie Chicks, Not Ready To Make Nice - Finally, found a song, or perhaps part of a song that sorta conveys how I've been feeling all this while. Aching over something so so so long ago, yet fresh in the mind. And it's been keeping me awake again. I think my reserve of adrenaline is running low. I'm tired, mentally and physically. I need some (actually a lot) of rest. I just calculated my sleep debt, think I owe my body about 20 odd hours in the past week. I'm impatient, very impatient. I can't wait for recovery, perhaps one day finally. But definat... http://purplishrain.multiply.com/journal/item/41/150207 Thu, 15 Mar 2007 13:24:39 -0000 To be To be and Not to be... Stumbled upon this really cool site muahahaha.. :) <a href="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/QuestionList.cfm"><a href=http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/QuestionList.cfm>http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/QuestionList.cfm</a></a> Anyway its 130 Questions as a Medical Speciality Aptitude Test. Turns out that im a.... closet pathologist or radiologist. Fwah I'm daam boring hor?    Rank <img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="25">Specialty Score 1<img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="45"> <img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="25">pathology 44<img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="76"> 2<img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="45"> <img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="25">radiology 42<img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="76"> 3<img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="45"> <img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="25">occupational med 41<img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="76"> 4<img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="45"> <img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="25">infectious disease 40<img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="76"> 5<img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="45"> <img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="25">endocrinology 39<img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="76"> 6<img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="45"> <img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="25">allergy & immunology 39<img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="76"> 7<img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="45"> <img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="25">neurology 39<img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="76"> 8<img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="45"> <img src="http://www.med-ed.virginia.edu/specialties/images/spacer.gif" height="1" width="25">rheumatology 37... http://purplishrain.multiply.com/journal/item/39/To_be_To_be_and_Not_to_be..._ Sat, 24 Feb 2007 06:46:04 -0000 Of War and Of Beauty... As I blog about this, you guys are sure going to die laughing... The bane about flying up and down every 6 months is of course as what i blogged about before, packing unpacking... then also infamously "sleeping around" on different beds (what else huh?)... And of course jet lag... but this time... Topping my list of "Why I don't like flying every 6 months is" I can't watch War and Beauty!!! 金枝慾孽!!! Ok. Well. It's a TVB drama. Not just any TVB drama alright thats screening on telly now! It's about how imperal concubines/enuchs/maids/ etc etc try to outwit and outplay each other just to gain the emperor's favour! Each think they have the situation in control, but little do they know that others know of what they are doing and outsmarting them!!! Confused? erm.. like the survivor, TVB -style!! But its not like any of those boring detective/medical TVB drama, or like those 1000 episode "Zhen Qing"... This show is truly quite intelligent with an unexpected plot, and horridly unpredictabl... http://purplishrain.multiply.com/journal/item/38/Of_War_and_Of_Beauty..._ Tue, 16 Jan 2007 16:39:39 -0000 06...oh 06. My resolution: "May the best of this year be the worst of next year" Possible? being too optimistic if you ask me. 2007. *shrugs*... Nawp, not really looking forward to 2007. A big long year ahead. Since 2005 ended not quite the way i thought it would be, it was an ease for 2006 to be better. Brewerkz was a blessing, Cambodia was like a 5 year itch dream come true. And finally hitting the lightest I have ever been post-cambodia since i recall looking at the scales was like... hmmm.... sugar on top of an icing (which had better not be the last since endless weight gain since then due to constant mugging). Finally completing research and moving on to real medicine was like an initiation rite, that turned out to be close to what i call a nightmare. Anyway, Med school, bad school, still gotta go to school. 2007 2007... School School School. Exams Exams Exams. Internship Internship Internship. I'm sad to see 2006 go by like that. 2006 was a blast. It was fantastic at least for a while. It ... http://purplishrain.multiply.com/journal/item/36/06...oh_06._ Sun, 31 Dec 2006 10:58:21 -0000 041106 Disclaimer: this was written on one of those "lonesome" nights. My eye kena a bit of allergic conjunctivitis = cant wear contacts = cant go clubbing. Anyway, its time for a post, one of my friends suddenly "talked" to me on msn to asked if i was still alive, because my blog was stagnanting. Wow, people actually read this... so its time for a post i guess... What to write about though, I dont climb mountains, dont travel like an air stewardess, dont quite have a sense of humour, not that gorgeous to create a photo-blog, life's just hospital, hospital... and I'm sure you get more excitement from Grey's easily with scandals bombs and flying scarples... Maybe I should just write about Me, myself and my insane morbid thoughts then. ;) So much going through my mind these days, exams in less than 28 days, and so much more to go. So much to study. It has come to a point where I don't know where to start, coz no matter how i go about starting, it will never really end. Med exams are... http://purplishrain.multiply.com/journal/item/35/041106 Sat, 4 Nov 2006 14:32:31 -0000 My wife the Queen... Disease: Hepatic Encephalopathy Cause: End-stage Liver Failure due to Hepatitis, Alcohol, Congenital Problems. Cure: Liver Transplant. Mechanism: Liver failure --> increased toxins in blood --> damage brain. Signs and Symptoms: Hepatic Flap, Cirhosis of the liver, Ascities of the abdomen, Confusion. Investigations : Blood tests (LFTs, FBES, Coags, U & Es) And MMSE (minmental state exam to determine confusion) MMSE Dr: What date is it today, John*? John: 3rd October, doc. Dr: Do u know where u are John? John: A hosptial with a pretty good view, doc. Dr: You reckon you still remember when was WWII, John? John: errrr.... 1940 doc? Doc: How about the Prime Minster John? John: !#@!#$#@!$! John Howard. Dr: Who's the Queen John? John: *reaches over to hold his wife's hand*. Thats simple Doc, Her. Awwwwwwwwwww Either: he's really confused to be confused about who the real Queen is or he's... in L-O-V-E. What you reckon? Patients shock you huh? * Patient's name has been changed to protect their ident... http://purplishrain.multiply.com/journal/item/34/My_wife_the_Queen..._ Tue, 3 Oct 2006 04:58:53 -0000 Cambodian PA7 Slideshow for Sponsors --- Courtesy of QM!! Project Angel 7 Memories trickling in once more!!! Offical slideshow for our sponsors... Better than nothing la i guess! ;) http://purplishrain.multiply.com/links/item/1/Cambodian_PA7_Slideshow_for_Sponsors_---_Courtesy_of_QM Sun, 17 Sep 2006 13:41:15 -0000 Cambodia - Backpacking and More Fun!!! http://purplishrain.multiply.com/photos/album/20/Cambodia_-_Backpacking_and_More_Fun Fri, 15 Sep 2006 11:14:28 -0000